The Davebrand Monthly Visitor

Oh Spektator. You provide a wealth of information for all things Central Asian. How I love your layout, your writing, and your ability to keep me up to date with everything I need to know going down in Bishkek. Rock on!

Spektator Ad

When I read “dog food for adults and puppies,” I immediately assumed human adults. Perhaps Dick van Patten is going for a new market. After all, in these difficult economic times, a little protein is good for you. You may have heard of this dog food from John Hodgman’s remarkable new book, “More Information Than You Require.”

From the New York Times:

A Wal-Mart employee in suburban New York died after he was trampled by a crush of shoppers who tore down the front doors and thronged into the store early Friday morning, turning the annual rite of post-Thanksgiving bargain hunting into a Hobbesian frenzy.

Maybe the real “War on Christmas” isn’t being caused by athiests or liberal judges. Maybe Christmas just needs to be saved from itself.

But what else is new?

In his latest diatribe, he points out his restaurant experience:

So, I have a confession and a suggestion. The confession: I go into restaurants these days, look around at the tables often still crowded with young people, and I have this urge to go from table to table and say: “You don’t know me, but I have to tell you that you shouldn’t be here. You should be saving your money. You should be home eating tuna fish. This financial crisis is so far from over. We are just at the end of the beginning. Please, wrap up that steak in a doggy bag and go home.”

Um, buddy… what are you doing in a restaurant then? Wouldn’t it make more sense to stand outside the restaurant and discourage people from entering? Shouldn’t you be eating at home? And what’s wrong with finishing the steak? They’ve already spent the money. If they can afford steak, buying one extra can of tuna fish tomorrow won’t break them.

And tuna fish is high in mercury. Not recommended for pregnant or nursing women. Or anyone more than two or three times a week.

Also, earth <> flat.